"I'm so excited and I just can't hide it."~ Pointer Sisters

Last Saturday I was coaching my niece’s cheer squad, there was two games and during the second game a young girl about five or six years old walked into the gym, she knew my niece’s friend and got excited to see her.  My niece’s friend invited her over to cheer with them.  This little girl lit up and eagerly came over next to the cheerleaders.  My niece and her friend each gave her a pompom (which was tots adorbs and melted my heart), this little girl could not contain her excitement, she was jumping up and down, had a huge smile on her face, and looking at the cheerleaders with complete admiration.  The girls taught her cheers and she cheered, by looking at her you would have thought she was going to Disney Land, but it was a small act of an invitation to cheer with the older girls.  At one point she yelled to her mom across the gym, “Look mom, I’m a cheerleader!”  There was several people who couldn’t stop observing this little girl and joy was pouring from her.  Her excitement was magnetic to me.  I turned to my mom and asked, when’s the last time you got that excited?

So far in the year 2016 I’ve had few exciting things happen in my life, I’m currently on a plane to travel to the Yucatan peninsula in Mexico and I moved to a new loft with a better view and lots of windows.  When I found out both of these things I was pretty excited, I’m sure I had a big smile on face and made a statement of how excited I was, but didn’t jump for joy, do a dance or yell with delight.  I thought about why I would hold back on my emotion? This little girl didn’t hold back and I admired her for it.  My take on it is when we get older we hold back on several emotions, some need to be held back, but why the fun emotions?  

There are too many negative emotions so let’s not hold back on our joy, excitement or happiness.  So the next time I’m excited I’m going to be unbridle about it, jump up and down, do a dance and yell for joy!

Photo credit: Sparrow & Bean Studios

Self Awareness

Recently I became aware of some ugly behaviors of mine.  I had a conversation with a dear friend who politely called me out on my crap.  I thought about what she told me and she was right.  What I love about this friend is she knows when and how to deliver a not so easy message to me.  Then I started thinking about some of my intentions and what I thought was good intentions really was not.  

I concluded some ugly truths about myself.  I realized I was competing with another woman.  This was a hard bite for me swallow and hard for me to write, but looking back and reflecting it hit me, I’m competitive.  Being competitive is not a bad trait, but I was being competitive in an unhealthy way and I’m not proud of it. 

A couple of months ago I had a really good conversation with my sister.  My sister is also someone who doesn’t let me get away with crap, and can be direct with me, you know like big sisters are.  In this conversation she told me I like challenges, and I thought she’s crazy I certainly do not like challenges.  Of course after I reflected, which by the way a couple of years ago I was a reactor most of the time, being in a leadership role has positively changed that now I'm a reflector most of the time, I still have my moments.  So thank goodness for my dear friend and sister!  I do like challenges and hence me being in a leadership role which is very fulfilling for me in that way.  Some of the challenges I was enduring over the last couple of years were again unhealthy.

Realizing these unhealthy behaviors is difficult for me, I wasn’t being the person or woman I wanted  to be to the world, but I can say now I am aware of it and can use these truths in healthy ways and better myself.  Isn’t that what life is all about growing and learning?  I’m a forever work in progress.

Photo Credit: Sparrow & Bean Studios