God's Voice

God’s Voice

There are three times I could hear God talk to me.  Today at church the pastor was talking about the importance of prayer and having an intimate relationship with God.  The pastor hit home with me when he said it’s a conversation, just like with a friend or a loved one.  It doesn’t have to be perfect, He knows all of your imperfections and still wants to pursue a relationship with you. I know this and I needed to be reminded of it.  The pastor said it's about praying and listening. As the pastor prayed at the end of service, I started thinking about when I have heard God clearly speak to me, and felt the strong urge to share my stories.  

The first time was when I longed to find a church that would deepen my relationship with God.  I would drive out to Jordan Creek and drive past Lutheran Church of Hope.  I was always curious and one day I drove by and heard “come visit.”  My sister had just gotten back from Hazelden and also was longing for a deeper spiritual relationship.  I asked her to come with me, she said yes, and we both fell in love with the message Pastor Mike delivered.  There are times I am better at my relationship with God, it depends on my fears or poor choices, I get lost in He would love me less because sometimes I’m not a good person.  Lutheran Church of Hope reminds me He loves all of me and my imperfections, and by amazing grace I am saved.

The third time was two years ago my work place was in some turmoil, and my unit was in need of a manger/educator.  l was in a meeting and thought who would be crazy enough to step up and take that position on, and as I was sitting there God said, “Melissa it’s time, you need to step up.”  I wanted to help make my unit better, and thought okay God I will take on this challenge. I interviewed and at the time shared the position with two amazing women.  There have been times when I have wanted to throw my hands in the air and yell I quit.  I have wanted to take the easy route and step down, but every time I try to do just that He manages to bring me back into focus and gives me the patience and energy to keep going.  I could go deeper into that story but I will save it for another blog post.

The second time, yes I purposely went out of order, is one I have not shared with a lot of people.  I believe only two or three people have heard it.  The reason I feel compelled to share it now is because it was an important moment for me and if I’m blogging about God’s voice than I cannot dismiss it. I’m protective of this story and the man who shares it with me.  I was in a relationship with a man that didn’t start on a solid foundation.  We fell for each other quickly and it was intense.  One night we were standing in my kitchen, and it was at a point where he knew he was moving too quickly and wanted to slow down.  In my heart I knew it was the right thing to do but I didn’t want to loose him so I had a moment of panic in my head and thought, oh God what should I do? That’s when He said, “just love him.”  As simple as that, “just love him,” I love how God is direct and to the point.  Although the relationship ended and I know it was never meant to work out, I am confident in the love I gave this man, and I still love him from a distance.  I love him and myself enough to let him go.  There are times when I get angry and/or sad about certain things, but there are many lessons I learned from that relationship and from him.  He always listen to my voice and I always felt I could be myself with him. I think and pray for him often, that he knows he is worthy of being loved.  So at the times when I want to be angry, I think about Martin Luther King Jr’s famous quote, “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” And more importantly I think of God’s voice saying, “just love him.”

These are three stories of when I can say I heard God, I'm sure there are other times He has tried to talk to me, but I didn't hear it.  I continue to work on my relationship with God and listening to Him too.

Photo Credit: Sparrow & Bean Studios

Being Single

“The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.  And if you find someone to love the you that you love, well, that’s just fabulous.” ~Carrie Bradshaw 

Often I get asked “Why are you still single?”  Well, that is a very simple question and I would like to give a simple answer but it’s really a complex one.  Can I take an hour of your time? Ha, just kidding!

Recently I went to dinner with my thirteen year old niece Cate and I told her my story that after graduating from high school I went to Iowa State University for two weeks.  I thought I wanted to be an educator and quickly changed my mind and decided to go into nursing.  She asked me “Where do you think you would be if you stayed at Iowa State?”  Then she said, ‘you wouldn’t be downtown.”  I thought about it, I would probably be married, have children and live in the ‘burbs.  I panicked a little, and became sad, not because that is what I want but because I love my life.  If I had chosen to go to Iowa State I wouldn’t have my two pups, traveled to places like Mexico and Ecuador, and I wouldn’t have seen the amazing and most miraculous things that I have in my nursing career.  I wouldn’t be writing this blog, and what I fear the most I would have settled.

Days after our dinner I continued to think about Cate and I’s conversation.  I enjoy being single and I am patient enough to wait for the right relationship to come along.  This day in age online dating is the thing, I’ve tried it and it’s not for me.  Don’t get me wrong there are many couples who have met online and have successful relationships. I’m an old fashion kind of gal, I want to meet a gentleman in real life, be pursued and treated like a lady. I’m a hopeless romantic and love old fashion classic romance movies, “Houseboat” with Sophia Loren, “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” with Audrey Hepburn.  I want to find a gentleman to compliment my life.

I am going to hold out for what I want and I promised myself I will not settle.  In my past that what I have done, and I was not being true to myself.  I have learned a lot about what I do want and about myself from my past relationships. Another promise I made myself for 2016 is to have the courage to venture out alone.  Tonight I plan to go to an event all by myself, I hope to meet some cool new people.

So the next time you ask a single friend, family member or acquaintance “Why are you single?” just keep in mind they may be okay with it and holding out for what they want.  I guess that is a simple answer to the question. 

Photo Credit: Sparrow & Bean Studios

"We don't have to do all of it alone. We were never meant to." ~Brene Brown

I have thought about starting a blog for a while and here I am thinking about how I wanted to introduce it to the world.  I think about where I am at in my life and the people who surround me, the things I have experienced, and all of those things are what brought me to wanting to start this thing.  Really it’s a public journal I hope will help other women to know they are not alone.  There are all types of women out there with all different types of lifestyles, goals, dreams and fashion.  

At first, I wanted to start a fashion blog but there is more I can offer to the world then fashion tips, though fashion is a huge passion of mine.  Through all my experience and the lessons and what the women who surround me have taught me, I hope to reach all types of women.  

I want my message to say to all women that our experiences, choices and voices matter.  There are many people in my life that have guided and helped me get to this place of being a confident and strong female.  I don’t always do life in a perfect way but I am proud of where I am at today.

So this blog is about life, the highs and lows, the successes and failures, because that is what is all about.  I have a love for myself, my pups, and my family and friends.  I have a passion for being a nurse, fashionista, aunt, daughter, sister, and friend.

I want to be about love, give love and receive love to ourselves and others.  So here’s to all women and love, cheers!!

Photo Credit: Sparrow & Bean Studios